Hillary Rodham Clinton

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HRC, you two-time failed presidential reject, walking vodka advertisement, and the biggest sore loser since participation trophies were invented. How is it that you have more scandals than brain cells and still think the American people want you anywhere near power?

Let’s get one thing straight, you cackling crypt keeper—you didn’t lose to Russia, sexism, or a grand conspiracy… you lost because you are the most unlikable, corrupt, power-hungry hag to ever slither through D.C. You couldn’t even beat a billionaire businessman with no political experience because, unlike you, he actually gave a damn about this country.

President Trump wiped the floor with you in 2016, and your shriveled-up, swamp-infested carcass still hasn’t recovered. You spent years crying, whining, and blaming everyone but yourself, all while stuffing your pockets through backdoor deals.

You belong in a prison cell, not on a stage pretending you’re relevant. If there’s any justice left in this country, your final act won’t be another pathetic campaign—it’ll be a perp walk straight into Gitmo.

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