Dear Self Checkout Stores

Dear Self Checkout Stores (Walmart, Lowes, Publix, Target),

    You are almost exclusively self-checkout now. The last time I was there, you had a lady stopping everyone at the exit, checking their receipts. I chose not to participate in this nonsense. I just skipped the exit line and left. I heard her say, "Sir, oh Sir" as I walked out the door to the parking lot, raising the receipt above my head.

    You dumb bastards can either trust me to do self-checkout, or you can put your cashiers back in place. I'm not interested in proving that I did your job for you. Don't audit me for a position you refuse to employ.